Here are some of the latest headlines from the blue and white orb majestically do-si-doing in some obscure galaxy so remote not even a Klingon war fleet could find it if they flew right under its nose. Your attention please:
Hunting Norwegian whalers shock tourists
I'd be shocked too if, while following a docent around a narrow Oslo street I happened to come upon a team of thugs harpooning a covey of cowering fishermen.
Monkeys are hard-wired for facial recognition
Which will undoubtedly lead to the demise of that classic simian one-liner "Eeeh! Ooo-oo-Yeeeh!" (translation: I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception).
California scientists reopen Ice Age dig site
What? Am I the only person around who missed the big announcement that wormhole travel is now available?
Dutch paleontologists find remains of dodo
No kidding? Since when did Michael Moore move to Amsterdam?
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I knew there were reasons that I don't watch the news!
my last comment wasn't spam. the "scooby snack" was a hyperlink to symphony no. 5 of jean sibelius. it was my way of saying "good job" and "thank you" for the upbeat news posting. alas...